Wayne Manor
by bookworm4497
Summary: Robin takes the team to Wayne Manor! Must I say anything else? Sequel to Circus Again, although you don't have to read that to understand this story.
1. Chapter 1

Here it is: the long awaited (or not) sequel to Circus Again!

In which Robin pretty much kidnaps the team and brings them to Wayne Manor, with or without Bruce's permission. Then again, even if he didn't ask Bruce, I'm sure he knows. He _is_ the Goddamn Batman.

Sorry it took so long. I have camp as an excuse, but I've been putting it off since I came back. Sorry!

Oh, and for all you readers who never read Circus Again, it's not strictly necessary to read it, but you should anyway. It's an awesome story, if I do say so myself.

And finally, this is short. I know it's short. It will get longer, I swear. This is pretty much the prologue.

* * *

It had been 4 months since Robin's identity had been revealed. Not much had changed. Yes, Robin occasionally took off his mask or glasses, let them call him Dick (although for the most part they still called him Robin per force of habit) and joked around about what had happened in chill that day with Artemis or helped with her homework. But they didn't know anything about his private life other than what they had learned from the circus, and that was mostly about his past, not his present.

Artemis had bugged him about it, but he kept brushing her off. It seemed like they would never know more.

That was about to change.

Robin strolled into the cave, whistling and looking perfectly innocent, like he hadn't a care in the world. Wally was instantly suspicious. He had learned from experience that when Robin had that face on, it meant Trouble with a capital T. Sure enough, Robin smirked slightly and then announced, "We're going on a field trip." The team looked up and exchanged glances. Their last field trip had been to the circus. "Does Batman know about this?" Megan asked. Robin smirked. "Maybe. We're going anyway." "May I ask where we are going?" Aqualad asked politely. Robin's reply was quick and chipper. "You can ask, but I'm not gonna tell. To the bioship!"

KF rolled his eyes- the kid had never gotten over the fact that Batman didn't let him say 'to the Batmobile' and overcompensated whenever he could- and followed after him. It was better to go along with whatever the ninja had planned and hope it didn't get you killed, seriously injured, or in deep doggy doo-doo with Bats. Unfortunately, most of them involved at least one. He had learned that the hard way, and he could only hope the rest of the team wouldn't have similar experiences.

Then again, it could be hilarious. Guess he's have to wait and see.

The rest of the team followed nervously. What did the mischievous bird have in store?

* * *

As I have said in several of my other stories, told you it was short.

Until next time!

Review!


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry for the wait, but here's chapter 2! (and yes, I do consider 2 days a wait. I try to update daily, but...)

Just so you know, I completely botched up the description of the entrance, but oh well. You'll see what I mean. I just tried to get through it as quickly and painlessly as possible.

The chapters are getting longer. Still kind of short, but we're getting there. I have another story to type as well as this one, you know.

And I realized I forgot this first chapter:

DISCLAIMER: What do you think?

* * *

Robin sat down in the pilot's seat and began to fly to bioship to… somewhere. He had insisted that he had to be the one piloting the ship, reasoning that none of the others knew where they were going and he refused to give any hints, including coordinates of the mystery location. He did, however, admit that the place was in Gotham.

That was the first hint.

The second was that he had taken off his glasses and did not have a mask on. He was also dressed in civvies.

The third clue was that said civvies were much nicer than what he normally wore when with the team. He was wearing a button-up collared shirt that was almost exactly the same shade of his eyes and nice black pants. He was wearing sneakers, but they were sneakers that were obviously more expensive than anything any of the others owned.

Having noticed all this, Artemis asked sarcastically, "what, are we going to a party or something? We seem to be severely underdressed." Robin just grinned at her. "This," gesturing to his outfit, "is standard Dick Grayson clothes. I'n obligated to wear them. You guys, however, are my ordinary friends from karate club- with the exception of Artemis, 'cause you're from school, and Wally, 'cause everyone already knows him- and so do not have to dress like a rich snob."

The team nodded, digesting this new information. "Wait, so this has to do with your ID?" "Yup." Dick answered, popping the 'p'.

They flew on, talking quietly. Occasionally, one of them tossed a guess Dick's way. He just smirked and said no to all of them.

Finally, Dick landed the bioship. The team disembarked and looked around at their surroundings. They were at the edge of a wood, near a cliff. They could see a house in the distance. Everyone was confused, except for Wally, who suddenly understood what was going on here.

"Umm… where are we?"

Unfortunately, the rest of the team had no clue.

Dick had an evil look on his face. "Unfortunately, I can't exactly bring the bioship in through the inside way, so I had to go for one of the back ways. This is the main one though. Stand back."

The team obeyed, becoming even more confused, except for Wally, who now had a knowing smirk on his face.

Dick pressed a button on some sort of remote that he had produced from nowhere.

The team jumped back, startled, as the cliff face in front of them fell away to reveal a long tunnel. They turned to stare at Dick.

"What?" He said innocently, with a sparkle in his eyes that was anything but. He led the way back to the bioship and brought them through the tunnel into a large cavern.

The team filed out of the bioship, eyes popping out of their heads.

Dick cackled. "Welcome to the Batcave.

* * *

And done!

Dick is such a troll :) Pretty much this entire story is going to be Dick trolling the team in various ways. I love it.

Review!


	3. Chapter 3

Ok, so the description of the batcave is completely from my head. I referenced nothing, so don't take my word on anything.

Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.

* * *

The team stared, wide-eyed. "Wow." Megan whispered. Artemis, Conner, and Kaldur were speechless.

Wally and Dick took one look at their teammates faces and burst out laughing.

"Your… your faces…." Wally wheezed. "Priceless" Dick agreed. "Want me to send you the footage?" "Please." Wally chocked out, and both boys collapsed again, laughing.

They were standing in a huge cave (dur). A gigantic computer system filled one wall, complete with several keyboards and a ginormous monitor. Shelves full of equipment dotted other walls, and there were several hallways branching out from the main room. Bats- actual bats- flew high above them, chattering and swooping around.

It was awesome.

Dick and Wally finally managed to stop laughing. "So," Dick started casually, "like I said, this is the Batcave. Neat huh? Touch anything and I can't guarantee that you'll leave with all your limbs intact. So don't touch."

Wally had apparently already decided to disobey him and had zoomed over to a cabinet and removed a granola bar from it, which was gone in about 5 seconds. Artemis raised an eyebrow at him. "Looks like Kid Idiot already decided not to listen."

Dick shook his head. "We gave up on Wally ages ago. That's actually his snack cabinet down here, for when Alfie isn't down here to feed him."

"Alfie?"

"Don't actually call him that. His name's really Alfred, or on bat business Agent A or just A-" "Or Batbutler!" "-Wally, he's told you not to all him that. Anyway, he's awesome and makes killer chocolate chip cookies. Even Batman eats them."

Everyone- other than Wally of course, who had been witness to this- blinked at the image of the big bad bat snacking on cookies and drinking milk.

"Seriously?" Artemis asked, sounding slightly skeptical.

"Yup." Dick said cheerfully. "It's sort of a tradition. We've been eating them since I came to live with him."

Everyone added a hyperactive 9 year old to their mental image of Batman eating cookies. It was strangely terrifying.

"Do… do you think he could teach me to make good cookies?" Megan asked tentatively. "I always burn them."

"I would be honored, Miss Megan." They turned around to find an elderly man dressed in a suit standing at the mouth of a staircase and holding a tray of cookies.

"Batbutler!" "Alfie!"

Dick and Wally ran over to give him a hug and steal a cookie or two. Or five.

Once the two boys had let go of him, the man straightened out his suit and smSo failed at the team. "My name is Alfred. I am the butler here. Would you like a cookie, before Masters Richard and Wallace eat them all?" The two boys grinned. They knew they would eat them all if they could, so they didn't mind getting called out on it. The team exchanged yet another look before they moved to take.

As they did, Dick told them, "Don't listen to Alfie. He's way more than a butler. He's like my grandfather, and this whole place would collapse on itself if he wasn't here. He's also saved Batman's and my lives more times than we can count. There wouldn't be a Batman without him. And he is the highest authority in the house, not Bruce, no matter what he says."

The team blinked. This was who bossed around the Batman?

So far, this tour was nothing like they expected.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey!

So, next chapter.

Again, I'd like to reiterate the fact that this version of the Batcave exists purely in my imagination. It's not based off of any one in particular.

Also, I borrowed the idea of a robin's nest from someone in this chapter... but I have no idea who created it, I just know it from some story that I can't remember. So, just so you know, I did not create it.

* * *

Still munching on cookies, the team followed Dick as he showed them around the Batcave. "This is the main room, duh, this is the main training room, the bathroom, changing rooms, Bruce's 'lab', the medbay…."

The team was astounded by how large the cave was. For some reason, whenever they though of the Batcave, they thought of, well, a single cave. With some bats. The reality _did_ have bats, both literally and metaphorically, but was actually a maze of rooms connected by narrow halls. It was obvious where Batman had gotten his inspiration from.

"Bruce stumbled on this place years ago, by accident." Dick explained. "I'm not going to go into the whole story, cause there's still a strict 'don't let the team know too much about the goddamn Batman, need to keep up appearances' sort of thing going on. At first, the cave was just the one room, but Bruce built it up over the years as he needed more room for stuff. Did you know he built an entire vault for kryptonite he's confiscated? Supermam told him to destroy it all, but, well…. he's the goddamn Batman, no one bosses him around, least of all the boy scout."

He stopped by a room that had a picture of a stylized robin on it. "This is my private training room. Bruce built it for me when he realized how important the acrobatic stuff was to me." He opened the door and the team stepped through.

There was a set of parallel bars, a balance beam, rings, a trapeze in the corner. The team noticed none of this at first. Their attention was immediately drawn to the large… thing in the center of the room.

It was a mess of ropes and wires and bars and bits of things dangling down hanging from the ceiling. "It's my 'nest'." Dick explained. "I can just go up there and fly, and there's so many different things up there I never get bored. I can play up there for hours."

He took a running start and launched himself into the air without warning, catching hold of a rope and then getting lost in the tangle of ropes. He swung around, laughing as he flew. The team smiled to watch. Finally, he dropped down, cheeks flushed, a huge grin on his face. Despite the exercise he wasn't breathing hard. "This is my favorite room." He grinned. "C'mon."

He led the way back to the main room, where the team took three steps in and then froze.

"Dick, what'd you get for question seven on the math homework?"

There was a girl. A civilian. Sitting at a table in the Batcave. The _Batcave._ Doing high school math homework. Acting like she was sitting at the kitchen counter at her home.

What on earth?

Dick didn't seem phased though. "75.5" Dick answered, moving to look over her shoulder, quickly pointing out what she had done wrong. She nodded and fixed it. "Thanks." she grinned, looking back at the team. "It's kind of helpful having your own math geek to help with your homework." "We prefer the term nerds, thankyouverymuch." Dick retorted.

"Ok, why is _Barbra Gordon,_ of all people, sitting in the Batcave doing her homework?" Artemis demanded.

The girl in question and the resident bird exchanged matching evil grins that promised nothing but trouble.

"Team, meet Batgirl. Batgirl, this is the team.

* * *

Because the Batfam wouldn't be complete without Babs. Plus, now Babs, Dick, _and _Wally can troll. Nothing better than that. *evil laugh*

Review!


	5. Chapter 5

I'm back!

Sorry for the wait, this is a hectic week.

Yes, this is a DickxBabs story. If you like DickxZatanna, go read my YJxTT crossover.

Anyway, time for Artemis to have a minor freak out, and Babs and Dick to troll.

Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Go look up disclaimer in a dictionary.

* * *

Artemis almost had a conniption. First, she find out that the annoying freshman who apparently thought he was candid camera and bugged her occasionally was actually her almost-brother Robin, and now one of her best girl friends from school was a superhero too? Did she have any _normal_ friends?

Batgirl was a relatively new development. She had only been on the streets for a few month and officially recognized as a member of the Batman for even less. No one had been able to understand why Bats would let another kid run around Gotham in tights. Knowing Barbra, there was some blackmail involved. Probably involving secret IDs.

Strangely enough, Wally _hadn't _been clamoring to meet her, which probably should have tipped Artemis off. She saw Wally frequently at her school, hanging out with Grayson and Gordon. It made sense. He hadn't wanted to meet her because he already knew her.

Wally confirmed this by grinning and waving at his fellow redhead. "Hey Babs." He said cheerfully. "Did one of the bats poop on you again?" Said redhead scowled. "One time Wallace, one time. It's happened to _you_ 5 times." Wally just grinned. "Well yeah, but not on the first day I was allowed here…" Dick snickered. "One of the hazards of working in a cave with actual bats." He explained to the team.

To everyone's shock- except Wally's, probably- Dick moved forward and kissed Barbra on the forehead. "Don't mind him." He reassured her. "It was cute. I never knew you could squeal like that." He quickly pecked her on the cheek and then ducked away, laughing, as she tried whack him.

Key word being tried.

She rolled her eyes at the ninja and turned back to the team. "Anyway. For those of you who haven't met me before, I'm Barbra Gordon, aka Batgirl. I figured this would be a good time to meet you guys, since hopefully I'll be working with you guys, although we're sitll working on getting B's approval. Speaking of which, Dick, did B give you the OK to bringing them here?" He just cackled.

Barbra looked at the dumbstruck expression on the team's faces; they were still processing what had happened before.

"Something wrong?" She asked innocently.

Megan spoke up shyly, her gaze switching between Barbra and Dick, who had returned and wrapped an arm around Babs. "Are you two… dating?"

"Yes." Dick answered. "For about a month. Aaaanyway," He continued before the team could comment, "we're hoping Babs will join the team soon, but B had to approve first, which can and probably will take a while." "But he'll let me join eventually." Babs said confidently. Dick muttered something that sounded suspiciously like _eventually could mean 20 years_. Barbra reached over and whipped the back of his head with a practiced movement. Dick winced, then smiled at her.

Who knew the Boy Wonder had a girlfriend?

* * *

Short. I know. It seems like this bunch of stories is doomed to be short. Oh well.

Review!


	6. Chapter 6

I'm back! Sorry for the wait, but you need wait no more! Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Nada.

* * *

Once everyone had finished freaking out about how Robin had a girlfriend, and Wally, Dick, and Babra had finished laughing at them, they continued on with the tour. Wally explained that he had known about the dating situation already- in fact, he had been one of the founding members of the 'get-Dick-and-Babs-together-already' committee, apparently run by Alfred- and so was free to enjoy their shock. Artemis then smacked him and demanded to know _why he didn't tell her even though they were dating._

Wally laughed nervously. "Love you, babe, but they asked me not too, and honestly, I'm more afraid of the troublesome duo than I am of you." He started backing away apprehensively as she took a step towards him. "Not that I'm not terrified of you too, of course. Um. Should I start running?"

"Probably." Dick advised him. Wally took off, prompting a game of _run away from the angry archer/assasin/girlfriend._

Babs watched more a moment and the leaned over to whisper to Dick. "Does this happen often?"

Dick nodded. "All the time. Seems like they're always fighting, although it's gotten better."

Babs grinned. "Awesome. Does it affect missions?"

"Sometimes. What do you think of the team members you haven't met yet?"

"They seem great too- is Superboy always angry?- I hope B will let me join soon."

"Me too."

Dick then moved to rescue Wally. He walked into the middle of the room and announced, "The tour will now be moving upstairs. Anyone not by the stairwell in 10 seconds will be left for the bats."

Artemis stopped short in surprise. "There's an _upstairs?_"

Dick rolled his eyes. It was weird, actually being able to see the movement. "Well, we don't live down here, do we?" He turned and headed towards the stairs. "Coming?"

The team scrambled to follow.

Dick led them up the stairs towards the house. "This leads to the study. The entrance is through this old grandfather clock. You move the hands to a certain time- which I will _not _be telling you- and it swings open. There's two large portraits on the wall opposite, since I know you'll ask. One's Bruce's parent, one's mine." They reached the top and Dick pushed the door open.

Two little boys jumped and looked at him guiltily.

"Um… hey, Dick. When'd you get back?" The older asked nervously.

Dick narrowed his eyes at them. "Were you trying to break into the Batcave again?"

The two boys avoided his eyes guiltily. Dick sighed.

"You know why we don't let you down there by yourselves, you could get hurt, and we don't want you running off alone."

He knelt and gave them a hug. The elder squirmed out of his hold quickly but the younger one willingly accepted his embrace. "Sorry." They heard him say. Dick chuckled and stood up, still cradling the boy. "Team, I'd like you to meet my brothers."

There was a beat of silence.

"I… wasn't aware you had siblings." Kaldur half said, half asked.

"They're adopted. We got Jay when B found him jacking the Batmobile's tires-" The team gaped at the boy, while he stuck his tongue out at them "- and Timmy was the next door neighbor, we adopted him after his parents died."

"Oh!" Megan gasped. "I'm so sorry!"

"S'okay." The young boy slurred cutely. "Dickie's my family now. An' Bruce, an' Alfred, an', an'…" He trailed off uncertainly. "an' Jay, I guess, when he's being nice."

"Of course we're family." 'Jay' scowled. He looked at the team suspiciously. "Did you ask Bruce if you could bring them here?"

Dick ignored him. "Their names are actually Jason and Timothy, but I prefer to use the nicknames. Jay might attack you guys, though…."

"Don't call me Jay and we'll be fine."

Wally laughed and zipped over to mess up his hair. "Whatever you say, Jay-bird." Jason glared at him.

"_Why_ does a kid know how to do the Batglare?" Artemis demanded indignantly. The kid glared better than she did!

"They may be young, but they're already in training. Jay mastered the Batglare pretty quickly, but then again, he alread had a street-kid glare, so he didn't have too far to go."

"Dick said I'm too cute to glare." Tim pouted. "Or throw Bat-a-rangs."

Megan giggled. Artemis blinked, a detail catching her attention.

"Street kid glare?"

"Mmm-hm." Jason nodded. "Parents died, and I was stuck on the street, which led me to stealing which led me to here."

The team stared. They had been through so much, but had soldiered through it and made a new life, a new family. It must have been hard for them all, but watching them interact, the Team couldn't feel sorry for them. They were happy, and that was all that mattered.

* * *

Yeah, I gave you a long one to make up for the wait.

Review!


	7. Chapter 7

And here's the next chapter! I'm shocked at how popular this story is getting, it's great.

Yeah, more fluff and non-action. A hint of sadness. Enjoy!

* * *

The Team was now standing in the hallway, gazing open mouthed at their opulent surroundings. Tim giggled at their expressions while Jay smirked at them. He was obviously amused, and they got the impression that this happened often, whenever someone new came to the house. Dick just laughed, but they knew he wasn't laughing at them.

"Artemis, you've been here before." He pointed out. "For that project we had to do. Why are you so surprised?"

Artemis colored slightly. "I've never been upstairs." She muttered.

"You know Bruce limited you to the living room so you wouldn't snoop, Crock." Jason informed her.

Barbra laughed and linked her arm through Artemis'. "Don't worry, I won't let you get lost." She said cheerfully. "Us Academy girls have to stick together you know."

Artemis rolled her eyes. "That wasn't what I've been worried about."

Dick led them through the rest of the house, showing them around. The team was amazed that Dick didn't get lost in the large house. Megan said as much and was rewarded with a chuckle from Dick and a full blown laugh from Wally.

"I do get lost." Dick told her. "All the time, actually."

"Yeah." Wally laughed. "One time…."

"Lets continue." Dick cut him off quickly, leaving the team with the impression of an embarrassing story.

When he showed them the upstair gym, Artemis demanded to know exactly _how many training rooms he needed_, prompting even more laughs.

Once they had finished, Dick let Tim show the team his room. Artemis and Megan were gushing over his cuteness the whole time while Jason scowled. He was _not_ jealous of the attention, thank-you-very-much. No, really.

Finally, Dick led them to his own room, since Jason refused to let any of the visiting heroes anywhere near his room. He and Tim retreated to their own rooms, while Babs went to finish her homework.

The Team stopped outside the room. "This is my room. Just to take care of something I know you're going to ask, there are no pictures of us-the team- in there. No hero stuff in there, everything's in the cave. There are, however, pictures of other people. The blonde girl in them is Bette, a friend from school. Redhead is Babs, duh. Bruce, Alfred- there are some pictures of Bruce smiling, so don't freak out- a few of Wally, Roy, and I when we were little. They'd make great blackmail Artie- I'll give you a copy of some of them. Ready?"

He turned and opened the door.

The Team stepped into a large room. A bed was shoved to one side, and a desk took up part of another wall. There was a TV with some type of video game hooked up to it and a large window looking out on the garden. Most of the team hesitated by the door, staring, but Kid Flash immediately zoomed over to the bed and jumped on it, sprawling on the pillows. He moved a picture hanging on the wall nearby and removed a snack from yet another hidden snack cupboard. Dick rolled his eyes. "That's Wally's snack stash in here. There's one in nearly every room. Alfred hates it."

Megan was looking at one of the pictures on the dresser. "Robin…are these… your parents?" Dick nodded as the others crowded to look. "That's one of the only pictures I have of them."

The picture showed a tall man and a woman. They were both dressed in red leotards with a gold wing design on the front. They both had huge smiles on their faces and were holding on to the hands of a young boy with brownish hair and sparkling blue eyes. He had the widest smile of all of them, and was full of life and happiness. They all looked so happy that the team had to smile. Dick smiled too, but his smile was sad, so different than the one in the picture.

"It was taken a few hours before the last show." He said softly. "The last picture they ever took."

Their eyes widened. The picture didn't seem so happy anymore.

Dick remained silent for a moment, then cleared his throat. "Ok, tour's moving on." He announced. "Downstairs for lunch... which Bruce may or may not be eating with us!"

* * *

And next chapter, we find out if Bruce actually gave permission! I think. Maybe chapter after...

Review!


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry for the wait. But it's up now!

Plus, I told you the chaps would get longer!

In this chap, we finally resolve the question: Does Bruce know or not?

Enjoy!

* * *

The team followed Dick back down the hallway, careful not to disturb any displays. The house was quiet, and their footsteps echoes eerily through the halls. It made them a little uneasy, but Dick continued on like it was nothing. "Sometimes I just slide down the banisters." He grinned. "Gets rid of the echo-y footsteps, plus if I time it right I can get 4 flip off the end before hitting the ground, or go high enough to grab the chandelier. Gave Alfred a heart attack the first few times, but he's used to my stunts now. Only gives him minor anxiety."

"Good old Alfie." Wally laughed.

Suddenly, the near-silence was shattered just as Kaldur was gearing up to ask a question. There was a small yell, and then the two younger boys ran out of their room and jumped on Dick. "Are we going for lunch now?" Tim asked. "Did you tell Bruce yet?" Jason asked wickedly, smirking. "'Caus I want to be there when you do. It'll be hilarious!" Dick looked at him amusedly. "Why do you immediately assume that I didn't tell Bruce?" "Because you're Dick. _Did_ you?" "Maybe, maybe not." He turned back towards Kaldur, ignoring the boys. "What were you going to ask?"

Kaldur looked startled. "How did you… never mind. Forgive me for asking, but why did you tell Wally your identity before the rest of the team?"

Dick paused. "I've known him longer than most of you, for one. The official reason? I needed someone who was aware of my sensitivities on the team to help me. The circus, falling- not nights, mind you, _falling_, it's completely different- and I've been teaching him Romani, which could help in certain situations, 'specially if I have a concussion."

"How would that-"

"If I get a bad enough concussion, all the english 'gets knocked out of me', so to speak. I revert back to Romani, which is my native language. I'm not sure how it would translate through mind speak, but we wanted to be sure that I'd have a definite way to communicate. Anyway, the real reason I told him was that he caught me during a nightmare, and I couldn't not explain everything to him after that- it was the week of the anniversary, I fell asleep on the couch, and it was _bad_."

Wally shuddered. "Never want to see you like that again." Tim and Jason nodded solemnly.

Artemis rolled her eyes. "How bad could it be?"

"**BAD**" Wally, Dick, Tim and Jason said simultaneously.

"My nightmares aren't the normal, tossing and turning type." Dick explained. "More like the tossing, turning, crying, screaming, flailing-around-like-I'm-having-a-seizure type, and it takes a lot to snap me out of it. Only Bruce has a foolproof method."

"You've slept in Mount Justice several times." Kaldur pointed out. "But we have never heard or noticed anything."

"Don't you think he'd have a plan for that?" Jason asked rudely.

"Jason, be nice. My room's soundproof Kal, and if we crash in the bioship or anywhere else I take a sleeping pill, specially made by B, to keep me from dreaming. Bats are prepared for anything."

"Not to mention DaddyBats wouldn't even think about letting his Baby Bird join a team, out of his sight, before he took care of things like that." Wally butted in.

Dick glare at him. "Don't let B catching you using those terms."

"It's a bit late for that." A deep voice said behind them. Wally yelped and jumped ten feet into the air before moving to hide behind Dick, who promptly stepped aside to reveal him. "Traitor." Wally muttered. "He he… um…. sorry?"

Turning, the Team found themselves face with a tall, fit man with deep gray eyes in a nice suit. They stared- it was weird being able to see his eyes, not to mention the small smirk on his face as he terrorized his son's best friend.

"Bruce!"

"Dad!"

"Daddy!"

The three Birds/Bats in training ran to give him a hug. The man hugged back, his face softening into a smile. "How's the tour going?"

Jason grumbled. "I thought Dick didn't tell you."

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "He didn't. But, he told Alfred and has been planning this for weeks. And I'm the goddamn Batman." He chuckled slightly at Jason's pout.

The team did a double take; was this really Batman, standing in front of them in a business suit, _laughing_, and bonding with his sons? He seemed like an entirely different person.

Dick grinned and answered the previous question. "It's going great. We've gone through pretty much everything. You're home early."

Bruce shrugged. "Took half a day off for your tour. I wouldn't have missed it." He reached over and tousled the bird's hair. "Go start eating. I'm going to change out of this damn monkey suit and I'll meet you in the kitchen."

Dick nodded.

Bruce left, ignoring the team for the most part, with the exception of reminding Wally to leave some food for him- and everyone else, for that matter, and that he better not have left candy wrappers lying around again.

The Team followed Dick, Wally, and the two boys into the kitchen, who were acting like nothing unusual had just happened.

The world was upside down. They actually _knew _things about Robin, were in his _house_, Wally had talked to a girl without hitting on her, said girl was Robin's _girlfriend_, and Batman had laughed and talked without scowl and was acting… well, nice.

The world was ending. It was the only logical explanation.

* * *

Heehee. Their minds are exploding.

Next chapter: The awkwardest lunch ever!


	9. Chapter 9

Sorry for the wait- too much homework! Ugh. Never take AP Classes.

And now, for the extremely awkward lunch!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own YJ. Or trolls.

* * *

Lunch was… awkward. Just a teensy bit uncomfortable for the team, although Wally and Dick seemed to be amused by the whole thing. Watching the team attempt to make small talk with Bruce was hilarious.

Bruce: So, Artemis, how's school going? Artemis: Oh, um… fine. _Pause_ I guess I got that scholarship because of the team, right? Bruce: Something like that, yes. Artemis. Oh, um, thanks. You know, for the scholarship.

_End Conversation_

Megan: I… um…. like your tie sir. It's very close to the color of Ro- I mean, Dick's eyes. Bruce: Thank you Megan. Yes, that's why Alfred bought it for me. Dick: He bought me one similar to the color of Bruce's eyes, but it was…. um….. accidentally destroyed. Maliciously. Bruce: It wasn't a very nice color, I'm afraid. Megan: Um… of course… I guess.

_End Conversation_

Bruce: So, Conner, has Clark helped you with training yet? Conner: …

_End Conversation_

The only person who didn't seem to be having trouble was Kaldur, probably because he acted pretty much the same with everyone: calm and polite. He answered the questions Bruce presented him with ease, if not enthusiasm. The team could tell he was a bit weirded out though.

To those who knew him well (Dick, and Alfred who was hovering outside the door), a smile could be detected hovering around Bruce's face. He hid it for the sake of the team though. He was having a great deal of fun. Screwing with people's heads was one of his favorite pastimes. Usually, he had to content himself with Clark or Barry, but now he had four fresh victims. This was great, for him at least. Not for the team.

The team was relieved when the meal finally ended. At this point, they were all thoroughly creeped out.

Safe back in Dick's room, Artemis let out a sigh. "Seriously, I though he was scary as Batman, but some how he was even _scarier _as a civilian!"

Dick laughed. "It was like that for me too." He told her. "I wouldn't come within three feet of him when he first took me in, but then he started making an effort and I started seeing the kinder side of him. So when I met him as Batman, I didn't think he was as scary anymore." Dick smiled, reminiscing. "I was still terrified though."

Artemis grumbled. "I swear, he was enjoying that."

"Oh, he was." Dick assured her. "Messing with people's heads is, like, his favorite thing to do. He does it with everyone. Next time you see him, he'll probably make a joke just to creep you out even further."

Artemis gaped at him. "Dude, your dad's messed up."

"Yes, yes he is. He's also probably watching us from the security camera at the moment."

Artemis blanched. "Wha…what?"

Wally laughed. "Oh, I remember when that happened to me." He mused. "I couldn't walk without feeling pain for a week, and I couldn't run for 3 days."

Artemis' eyes widened. Behind her back, Dick and Wally exchanged evil smirks.

The door opened and Barbara strolled in. "Hey everyone. What's going on?"

"We're terrifying Artemis." The boys said simultaneously. "She said Bruce was messed up, and we pointed out the security cam." Dick explained. Barbara nodded. "It was nice knowing you, Artie. What kind of flowers would you prefer for your coffin?"

Artemis gaped at them. The team looked horrified.

Down in the Batcave, from where he was, in fact, watching from the security camera, Bruce smirked.

_Those trolls. I pity the team, left alone with them._

* * *

As I said, I love troll!Wally, Dick, and Babs. It's so much fun :)

And this is officially how far I got in my notebook-of-writing, so I need ideas!

Review!


	10. Chapter 10

New chapter!

Includes: Trolling, confused team, trolling, Wally being an idiot, the team being shocked, more trolling, mentions of Bruce's girlfriends, and even more trolling. I'm pretty sure I combined, like, three continuities with the girlfriend thing. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything.

* * *

"So, now what?"

The Team was still in Dick's room. Most of them were sitting on the floor, although Dick was hanging upside-down from a random bar stretching across the ceiling, apparently for that exact purpose, and Wally was lounging on the bed. Barbara was sitting at the desk.

Dick twisted slightly to look at Conner upside down. "Now, we waste time until nighttime. Your one-time-only free pass to Gotham also comes with a night of patrol, cuz Bruce has a date with Selina tonight and so, as punishment for bringing you without permission, I have to bring you on patrol so he doesn't have to go."

"Who's Selina?" Megan asked curiously.

"Bruce's sometimes-maybe-girlfriend. When they're not trying to kill each other or stop/do crimes."

"Which normally ends up being kinda kinky anyway." Babs pointed out.

"True, true."

"BATMAN HAS A GIRLFRIEND?"

"That's not even the weirdest part." Wally chuckled. "The weirdest part is that Batman's girlfriend is a _villainess."_

Barbara shrugged. "She's not really a real villain… she toes the line. Yeah, she'll steal, but she'll return whatever it is to Batman soon enough."

"She's better than Talia." Dick added.

"Talia?" Kaldur asked.

"Talia Al Ghul. Now, _she's _an actual villainess."

"Kinda. More her dad."

"She's still tried to kill us both before. At least Selina never actively tried to murder us. And anyways, Talia's _strict._"

"I still think Diana is the best though." Barbara sighed. "But Selina's pretty awesome too."

By this point, the team was completely flabbergasted.

"Wait, who's Diana?" Wally frowned.

The two Bats rolled their eyes and said, "Wonder Woman." Together in a _duh _voice. "We told you that already." Babs scolded.

"Batman dated Wonder Woman?" Conner asked, stunned.

"Yup."

"Yes, yes he did. That's done though. Now it's Selina. Talia was before that, I think."

"It kind of rotates."

Artemis had a thoughtful look on her face. "Selina…Selina…. why does that name sound familiar?"

"Selina Kyle."

"She's Catwoman."

The Team chocked. _Batman _was dating _Catwoman?_!?

"Anyway." Dick continued. "Babs, will you help with patrol tonight? It's gonna be tough."

"Sure."

"Why is it going to be tough?" Wally re-entered the conversation.

"We have to bring these idiots. With the possible exception of Artemis, they're all gonna get themselves killed. Remember the first time we brought you on patrol?"

"How was I supposed to know stepping on a weed would do that?"

"Dude, we were tracking Poison Ivy. Control over plants, hello?"

Wally grumbled unintelligibly.

The Team exchanged nervous looks. Dick hurried to reassure them. "Don't worry, we'll brief you on all the rules first."

"It'll only take two, maybe three hours." Barbara smirked.

"Yeah, there's only, like, 200 rules. No biggie."

"No, wait, those are just the Batfam rules, I think. There's more for non-Bats, aren't there? And even more for idiots who've never really fought in Gotham before"

"Oh yeah. A whole 'nother book or two full. OK, maybe this'll take a while"

"Do I have to be there?" Wally whined. "I already went through it once, I don't think I could stand it another time. It's just so dang _boring_!"

"Wally, you've been systematically breaking every rule in all of the books. Yes, you have to come."

The Team started to panic. They were screwed.

* * *

Trolololol!

Oh, poor team. There's no way they're getting out of here alive. :)

REVIEW!


	11. Chapter 11

New chappy!

Ok, so this block of chapters- after the meal, probably up to the patrol- is very heavy on dialogue. Not much description or whatever. Lots of talking. Dick and Babs apparently like the sound of their own voices.

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING

* * *

The team was still in Dick's room, still freaking out about all the ruled while Dick, Wally, and Barbara tried to hide their smirks. Finally, they managed to regain some composure.

"I _live_ in Gotham." Artemis huffed. "Why do I have to sit through a _class_ on how to survive it?"

"Have you ever gone toe-to-toe with the Joker?" Barbara asked.

"Or Two-face?" Dick added.

"They're not to be taken likely, and if you go patrolling with the Bats and want to live through the night, you have to know the rules."

"I mean, first time, Wally nearly got killed by Ivy because he stepped on a _weed_."

"OK, here's a test. What do you do if you see a stray cat?"

The team exchanged a look.

"Kick a can at it?"

"Ignore it?"

Artemis rolled her eyes. "You back away slowly, or feed it if you have anything. _Never _hurt it, or Catwoman will be after you."

"Correct." Barbara smiled. Dick took the next question.

"If you see a hyena in the street-"

"You have _hyenas _in Gotham?"

"-what do you do?"

The team stayed silent. A _hyena? Really?_

When Dick saw they weren't going to answer, he said, "You slowly back away, call one of the Bats, and then get the heck out of there. Hyenas=Harley Quinn=Joker. You do _not _go anywhere _near _Joker under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Got it?"

They nodded.

"What's the number one Bat rule?"

"Never leave home without the utility belt." Wally piped up.

"What's the number one rule when bringing Wally on patrol?"

"Don't" Dick grinned at Babs, "and if you absolutely have to, duct tape his mouth shut first and tie him down."

"Wally doesn't have a very good track record on patrol." Barbara explained. Wally pouted.

"I don't mess up… that often!" He protested.

"Yes you do." Both Bats said together. "Your track record is worse than Clark's." Dick deadpanned. "And he, somehow, almost got killed within the first five minutes of his first patrol. We're still not sure how that happened."

"Who's-"

"Superman. Didn't I tell you guys their civilian names at the circus?"

The team shrugged. Dick rolled his eyes at Barbara, who smirked back at him.

"OK, so that's, like, three of the rules." Barbara said brightly. "Only a few hundred more to go."

Artemis groaned. "Is this _really _necessary?"

"If you don't want to get killed." Dick said.

"Or tortured." Babs added.

"Or mutilated."

"Or blown up."

"Or mind-controlled by evil plants."

"Or mind controlled by some Alice in Wonderland prop."

"Or eaten by previously mentioned hyenas."

"Or get hit by a bazooka gun."

"Or beaten with a crowbar."

"Or shot."

"Or…um…"

"Mugged?"

"Nah, seems a bit mundane after all of that, doesn't it?"

"True. Eaten by a crocodile?"

"That'll work."

The team, minus Artemis who lived in Gotham, gaped at them.

"That could happen?!"

"Everything short of being murdered has happened to me." Dick informed them. "Gotham is a scary place. You don't get involved if you can't handle it, and most people can't."

The teens nodded, stunned. This was what their little brother went through? No wonder he acted so immature with them, it was probably the only time he _could _act his age.

"Ugh." Wally groaned and rolled over on the bed. "I'm so bored! Rules are boring!"

"Which is probably why you're almost killed so often."

Wally rolled over again and fell off the bed to the sound of laughter.

* * *

Yeah, Wally's an idiot, and general trolling is the rule. New person introduced next chapter! Be ready!

REVIEW! Please


	12. Chapter 12

Here's the next chapter!

For those of you who read Reuniting: sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I... um... lost my notebook. *Blushes in embarrassment* Until I find it, that story's on hold. Sorry!

* * *

Once Wally had gotten back up, and the laughter at his expense had stopped, Dick and Babs started going over more rules. Thankfully, only ten minutes later, the doorbell rang. Both Bruce and Alfred were out- business meeting and shopping, respectively- so they went to open the door. Dick peered through the peep hole and an evil smirk grew on his face. "Oh, this'll be fun."

"Who is it?" Barbara asked curiously. In answer, Dick unlatched the door and let the person in.

A tall, black haired woman walked- well, more like sauntered- in. She was wearing a tight black shirt with some yoga pants. She blinked at all of the teens. "Did Bruce do some more adopting?"

Dick laughed and hugged her. "Nope. This is the team. I told you I was going to invite them over sometime."

"Yes. You also told me that you'd tell me when, so I could meet them."

"I was gonna call you before patrol, promise."

"Ooooh, you're taking them on patrol, kitten?"

"Yup."

"I'll tell Red and Harles. Is Batgirl going to be coming?"

"Of course I am." Babs told her. "I wouldn't pass up this opportunity. They're going to get _killed_."

"Hmm, that won't do. I'll organize something. Harley can probably stop the Joker from interfering, if you promise that she can meet them."

"Sure. Our goal is to freak them out so much they won't ever want to come back." Dick smirked.

The woman smirked back. "Oh, _where _are my manners? I'm Selina, nice to meet you. Hello Artemis, nice to see you again. How's your sister?"

"Um… ok, I think." Artemis said slowly. Dick interrupted. "She's dating Arrow Head."

"Roy?" Selina looked surprised. "Huh. That's an unlikely couple."

"And you and Bruce aren't?"

"Point taken."

Artemis butted in. "Since when do you know my sister?"

"She's a cat themed villain. I make a point to meet them all. Anyway, your mother introduced us."

"Ah."

Artemis shrugged at the team's looks. "My mom knows most of the Gotham villainesses. Comes from being one of them. Pam and Harley come over for dinner sometimes."

"Really?" Barbara asked. "Why wasn't I invited?"

"They wanted to invite you, but Mom wanted to meet you first, and I couldn't exactly ask you to come over…"

"True. I'm coming next time."

"I'll send you the details."

"Red knows my ID, by the way. Just sayin', so you don't have to worry. Harley doesn't, but that's more because she doesn't really care."

Megan's eyes widened. "How many people know your IDs?"

Dick thought for a moment. "Um... you guys, duh, most of the League, Alfred, again duh, Bette-"

"_Bette knows?"_

"She knows about you too Artie. She's been helping us troll you, didn't you notice? Anyway, we're pretty sure the commish knows about me and Bats, but not Babs, Doctor Leslie, Lucius Fox, Selina, Ivy, Ras al Ghul, Talia al Ghul, um... I think that's it."

"So much for secret IDs. I think more people know your ID than mine!" Artemis exclaimed.

"No, pretty much every villain knows your ID 'caus of your dad." Barbara informed her. "Only a few of our know. And we're not sure about Dad, and Alfred and Leslie don't really count. Plus, only, like, 7 people in the League know."

Selina grinned. "You have to admit, Bats has been doing this for... how many years now? It's a miracle he hasn't been unmasked yet."

"He's come close." Dick mused.

"But it hasn't happened yet." Selina looked over at the team. "Why don't you guys tell me some stories about your team?"

"Sure." Dick said enthusiastically. They all sat down at the table and started swapping stories.

* * *

End of chapter. Yay!

REVIEW!


	13. Chapter 13

Good news! I found my notebook. Next chap of Reuniting should be up in the next few days.

Enjoy the chapter!

Oh, I totally made up the Dick meeting Selina thing. Just FYI.

* * *

After a while of storytelling, the group had relocated to the living room, where it was more comfortable. Selina was sitting in one of the armchairs, Barbara and Dick on a couch, Wally and Artemis on the other couch, Megan was perched on the end of a side table and the others were on the floor. The original 3 side- sorry, _partners_- were telling Selina about how they had formed the team.

Selina was laughing. "You really told the League that? _Get on board or get out of the way?"_

_"_Yes." Conner smirked. "You should have seen their faces."

Wally and Dick were snickering. "Oh, they were _furious_, but at the same time they couldn't believe we'd had the nerve to confront the entire Justice League."

Selina shook her head. "I can only imagine the look on Bruce's face."

"Eh." Dick shrugged. "He was kinda torn between being furious and being proud that I hacked the League, then hacked CADMUS- several times- and then came up with a strategy to defeat Blockbuster. He was only mad because I had put myself in danger. Daddybats ran rampant that night. The lecture was _not _fun."

"Um, Selina?" Megan asked tentatively. "How did you meet Robin?"

Selina blinked. "Well, now, that's an interesting story. Lets see, I had been flirting with Batman for a while before Robin came into the picture- teasing flirting, not really serious- and one time, we had started with our normal routine of trying-to-convice-Catwoman-to-give-back-whatever-she-stole-while-flirting, when this _kid_ comes out of nowhere."

"I was nine." Dick said. "And I didn't really want to watch my new dad flirting with some lady. Cooties and all." Wally snickered. "Cooties." Dick rolled his eyes. "I was nine, idiot. Anyway, I go up to them..."

_Flashback:_

_"Batman, are you flirting with the criminal?" A young voice asked. _

_Selina immediately stopped the flirting and looked around, her gaze finally landing on a young boy in a ridiculously bright costume. She raised an eyebrow. "Who are you?"_

_The boy glared- a pretty impressive glare- at her. "Robin, partner to the Batman, who you're FLIRTING with. Ew!"_

_Selina blinked. "Uh, what?" She managed. She looked at Batman, who shrugged at her. "Catwoman, meet Robin, my protégée/ son. Robin, this is-"_

_"Catwoman, aka Selina Kyle. I know."_

_Batman raised an eyebrow at the boy, who blushed. "I hacked the Batcomputer."_

_Selina gaped. "You HACKED the BATCOMPUTER!?"_

_The boy, Robin, looked at her innocently. "What? It wasn't that hard." He turned back towards Batman. "Can we go get ice-cream now?"_

_"Sure."_

_The Dynamic Duo flew off, Robin sticking his tongue out at Selina before he disappeared._

_Selina was left on the rooftop, completely flabbergasted._

"It took a while, but he warmed up to me eventually."

The Team was staring at Robin. "You hacked the Batcomputer when you were nine?" Aqualad asked, incredulous.

"It really wasn't that hard. I helped Bats design a new security system after."

"Dude, you're really good with technology."

"Duh. I mean, I designed and maintain the security in the Mountain and the Watchtower…"

The team froze.

"You designed the Watchtower security?" Wally confirmed. "So… you _knew _about it?"

Dick looked panicked. "Oh, shoot. Don't tell Roy, please."

"It's a bit late for that."

Dick turned around to see Roy in the doorway, looking pissed. Jade was standing next to him, looking amused.

"I'm screwed." Dick muttered.

* * *

Yeah, it's short. Deal. You should be happy you're getting a chapter on Yom Kippur.


	14. Chapter 14

Ok, I know this chapter is short and it is, again, mostly dialogue. But like I said, that's how it'll be until patrol, probably.

Speaking of patrol, is there anything you guys want to see... er, read before it? I'm kinda running out of ideas...

More trolling by Dick and Babs. The target? Roy. After his temper tantrum, that is.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: _the act of disclaiming; __ the renouncing, repudiating, or denying of a claim; __disavowal._ Now, look at the definition and use your brain.

(Definition taken from . I'm not plagiarizing! Is that how you spell it?)

* * *

Roy glared down at the young bird. "You _knew_ about the Watchtower? You knew. About. The. Watchtower. And you didn't tell us?"

Dick grinned nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, I kinda… uh… helped design it? And set up the security and been monitoring/updating it since I was… 10? With occasional help from Batman?"

_"WHAT?!" _Yeah, Roy was pissed. Seriously, after all that grief he had given everyone at the Hall of Justice, and Robin hadn't even taken his side..."Wait…" A thought struck the archer. "So then why weren't you pissed when they lied to us? You didn't join me, or even really seem annoyed."

"They didn't lie." Robin pointed out. "Yeah, the Tower is the main base, but the Hall of Justice is important too. It's our public front, people think that's our HQ so they don't suspect anything about the Watchtower. And I guarantee you that our 'induction' was leaked to the public, so it would have seemed weird if we didn't show up there that day. I mean, did you notice all the tourists? And I pretended to not know so you guys wouldn't get upset."

"Aren't tourists always there?"

"Not that many, and normally they're _inside_, you know, where all the excitement is? Looking at exhibits and such? Not lined up outside."

"Huh." Roy blinked. "I didn't think of that."

"No duh."

"Shut up, shrimp."

"Roy, be nice." Jade chided him. "Hey, Birdie."

"Hey Jade. How's life?"

"How do you think? I've been taking care of this idiot and trying to get out of The Life."

"Ah. How's that working out?"

"Trying to find a job is not fun."

"Hmm… I can probably talk to Bruce about that."

"Thanks, squirt." She ruffled his hair while he squawked indignantly. "WHY is everyone going for the hair?"

"Ok, not to interrupt," Artemis, well, interrupted, "But why is Jade here?"

"I was wondering that myself." Selina agreed. "Not that it's not wonderful to see you, Chesh."

"Roy brought me." Jade informed them. "I already knew about Robin, so why not?"

"Why do you know about Robin?" Conner growled.

"Caus we ambushed her in the park." Everyone turned to look at Barbara. "Hey, Red" Jade smirked.

Artemis gaped at them. "You know each other?"

"Well, yeah." Dick said. "Like she said, the two of us ambushed Jade in the park and threatened her with bodily harm if she hurt Roy in any way, shape, or form. Then we introduced ourselves and hung out a little. She's awesome at playing Ninja."

"Our games can last for hours." Babs smiled.

Artemis could not believe her ears. "Wait, you threatened my sister- and she didn't kill you-, gave up your IDs, and then played Ninja?"

"Well, not really in that order, but yes."

"And she was kind of torn between admiring our daring and contemplating how to kill us."

"Why would she hurt Roy anyway?" Artemis asked, bewildered.

"You didn't know?" Dick asked innocently. "They've been dating for about a year."

"It's pretty serious." Barbara nodded. "He was looking at _rings._"

Roy glared at them. "Shut up!"

Jade looked at Roy with a smirk. "What's this about rings?"

Roy spluttered, face red.

"I wonder how he's going to get out of this one." Barbara muttered.

"He should really just ask her already." Dick agreed. "We all know it's coming."

"Well," Barbara amended, looking over at Artemis, who was sitting, frozen, eyes wide, shocked speechless. "Not everyone. I think we may have broken her."

"Eh. She'll be fine."

* * *

They're such evil, evil trolls :) I love them. Wally wasn't really a troll in this, but I'm not sure if he knows.

I wonder who'd win Ninja, Babs, Dick, or Jade? Probably Dick, although Jade might have a chance...

REVIEW!


	15. Chapter 15

Sorry for the wait, but you need wait no more! I meant to do this yesterday, but it was attack of the one-shot day, apparently, so I spent the day typing up two new YJ one-shots. Oh well.

We are finally starting patrol, and I need ideas on how to make the team miserable! Help me!

Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything. Ugh, I'm so tired of typing these up...

* * *

Several hours past, explanations were heard, and hilarity and trolling ensued. All in all, the team was having a great time. They were learning about Robin, meeting his family, and just enjoying themselves. It was like a dream.

Too bad it was time for the nightmare.

Darkness had fallen, and it was time for patrol. This was going to be fun. For the Bats, anyway. Not so much for the team. It would probably be hell for them.

"Ok." Robin started. The team was lined up in front of him, awaiting instructions. Wally and Barbara were plotting behind him. "So, for patrol, I'm going to divide you up into teams. You'll either be with me, Batgirl, or Kid Flash. Yes, Artemis, Kid Flash. Most of the villains know him by now, so it'll be like you're with a Bat. He's practically been adopted into the Batfam. It'll be fine."

"Plus, last time one of them attacked KF, Rob went Bat-ballistic on them." Batgirl added. "They know better now. If you're with one of us, only the truly insane will try to mess with you. There's different rules when there's newbies in Gotham. Yes, Artemis you qualify as a newbie. You've never patrolled with a Bat. You're a newbie until you do that. Can you quit interrupting us? Thank you. Robin, continue please. Wally and I are planning how to make their lives miserable."

"Kay. Like I was saying, you'll be divided up. We will be going out as one group, initially, but if necessary, this is how we'll divide up. Artie, you'll be with me. God knows what you'd get into with KF or Babs. Kal, you can go with KF. Hopefully you'll be able to balance him out. Megan, you can go with BG. You should get along. Um…. oh. The teams are going to be uneven."

"No, they won't." Batgirl sang out. "We're gonna bring Hood and Red Robin." She smirked at Robin. "I said they could."

Robin blinked. "Um. Ok. We really want to kill them, don't we? Alright, you know what? Hood'll come with me and Artie, cause no one else can control him, Red can go with BG, and Con will go with KF. Will that work?"

"I hope so." Batgirl muttered. "But then again, with this group…"

"Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Alright, I'll go get Hood and Red, be right back!" Robin disappeared, hopefully to get this 'Hood' and 'Red', and not plan their impending doom.

"Who's Hood and Red Robin?" Megan asked.

"Red Hood is Jay-bird, and Red Robin is Timmy." Kid Flash piped up. "They came up with names and costumes already. Are you sure we should bring them?"

"Why not?" Barbara shrugged. "It's not like they won't have protection. Hell, we've got a whole team of superheroes running around Gotham tonight. It'll be fine. Actually," she stopped, considering something. "They might be better protection for the team than the team for them. At least they've fought in Gotham before."

At this point, Robin reappeared, with two tiny heroes. One was wearing a red helmet and a leather biker jacket, while the other was wearing a modified Robin suit, only with a _lot _more red.

"Everyone ready?" Robin asked cheerfully. The team nodded. "Good. First, though, rules. Again. If you run into a major villain- or anyone more dangerous than Catwoman- call me. I don't care if you're with Batgirl. Do not engage any of the big guys. Stay out of Crime Alley. Don't freak out the commissioner. He doesn't like supernaturally- stuff. That means powers. Do _not _allude to Batgirl being Barbara. He doesn't know. Got it? Good. Let's go!"

As they left, Batgirl muttered, "I wonder how Harley's doing."

* * *

"_Please, _Mistah J? For me?" Harley whined.

"But _why_ Harley?" Joker whined back. "I want to play with the kiddies! They could have such nice laughs, like Boy Blunder."

"_Please? _I promised Catwoman! It's important to the girls!"

"Fine." Joker grumbled. "I just don't like the idea of Bird Boy's team walking around like they own the place! They're just so… so… _serious_! None of them laugh! At least Bird Boy laughs sometime."

"Thanks, Mistah J!" Harley squealed. "And don' worry, the girls have a little something' planned for them!"

Joker stared at her for a moment and then started to laugh hysterically. "Oh, what fun! You and your friends are planning! Can you use some laughing gas? I want to hear them sing!"

"Sorry, puddin'," Harley said, skipping out the door. "But we can't do anything _too _bad. See ya later!"

* * *

Yeah, the girls are up to something. Good luck to the team! *Internal thoughts: _they're so going to die*_


	16. Chapter 16

Here's the next chapter!

More patrol, although we don't really get any action yet.

Oh, and apparently you all hate Wally, because I got several reviews saying I should kidnap/hurt/torture him. This is supposed to be a lighthearted, Bats+Wally trolling team thing. Not all angsty and torture-y. But thanks for the input.

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing

* * *

The group of heroes and sorta-heroes (Jason and Tim) headed to Wayne Tower first. Apparently, this was where all patrols started and ended. Some of them (Artemis) had known this already, but it suddenly made a lot more sense. You know, with the whole Bruce-Wayne-being-Batman thing.

"Alright troops." Robin grinned. "We're going to start patrol. At some point during the night, we're going to send you guys, Hood, and RR back to base so we can patrol Crime Alley. If, at any point, a major villain gets involved, you are to go back to base _immediately. _You obey any instructions given by any of the team leaders- yes, that includes Wally. He's an idiot, but he knows the theory of everything. Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah." Artemis put a hand on her hips. "How many rules are you going to give us, Bird Boy?"

"Gotham isn't like Star, Artemis." Robin snapped. "I almost died three times in my first week, and I've seen B and Batgirl come this close to death too many times for comfort. I do not want one of you in the hospital, and will give you as many rules as I see fit to accomplish that goal. Clear?"

"Crystal." Artemis swallowed. She'd never seen him so serious.

"Good." He turned towards the city. "Lets go."

He shot off a grapple and swung off. The others followed behind, trying to keep up. It was so obvious that this was his element, and that he was more comfortable here than on any of their missions. He knew exactly where to aim his grappling hook- he didn't even have to look. He was obviously following a pre-planned route, and was doing it on automatic. Artemis was positive that he knew the entire city like the back of his hand.

The sky lit up. A second moon hovered next to the first, with a Bat-shaped cut out.

Robin abruptly changed course. The team had to scramble to keep up and not get left behind. Only the other Bats and Wally knew where he was going.

Robin landed on a rooftop and faced the team. "Um… BG, Artie, and KF, you guys can come with me to meet with Gordon. The rest of you, stay put."

"Who's Gordon?"

"The commissioner." Batgirl answered. "He's probably got info on a case or a breakout."

"Dude, don't you think I should stay here?" Kid Flash asked. "I mean, we shouldn't leave them unsupervised."

"We'll be standing on a roof." Superboy glared at him. "I think we'll be fine."

"Eh, don't be so sure." Kid Flash retaliated. "Villains do know about rooftops, you know."

"Cut it out, you too." Robin interrupted before Superboy could punch Kid Flash."Sure, KF, stay here. Be right back!"

He, Batgirl, and Artemis shot off grappling hooks/arrows and made their way to a nearby rooftop.

"Out of curiosity," Artemis started, "Why-"

"-Didn't I want the others to come? Well, for one thing, it's a small roof. And Gordon doesn't like anything really… weird. Gotham's a mostly no-powers city, and that's how everyone likes it. Ivy's an exception."

Artemis nodded. Gotham had always had the least number of super-powered people. She could only imagine how much trouble her teammates would cause.

They finally landed on the roof behind Gordon. The two Bats landed without a sound, but Artemis gave them away. The Bats glared at her. She shrugged. "What?"

"We always freak out Gordon by arriving and leaving silently." Batgirl informed her. "It's practically part of our training regime."

"I'm so glad to hear that giving me daily heart attacks is training for you." Gordon said dryly. "Who's this?"

"Artemis. She's on my team, lives in Gotham."

"Oh." Gordon looked at her curiously. "I've never heard of her."

"Not many people have. It's supposedly a cover team." Artemis grumbled.

"Who else's on it?"

"Sorry, commish, can't tell you that." Robin said quickly. "But they're all in Gotham tonight. B's taking the day off."

"Terrific." Gordon sighed. "Well, Poison Ivy broke out again. She's been spotted downtown." He narrowed his eyes at the look the Bats exchanged. "What?"

"Nothing." They chorused together. "Thanks, Commishioner" Robin added, before glancing at Batgirl again. "I suppose the normal theatrical departure is out because of the tag-along?"

"HEY!"

"Yes, I think so." Batgirl nodded. Simultaneously, she and Robin took their grapples out and swung away, leaving Artemis alone on the rooftop with Gordon.

"Trolls." She muttered, before swinging off herself. Gordon just blinked before shaking his head and deciding that he did _not _want to know. He just hoped that Gotham survived the night.

* * *

Short, yes. Do I care? No.

Review!


	17. Chapter 17

I'm so, so sorry for the wait. Writer's block. And I wanted to finish Reuniting. But now that's done, so I just have this story to focus on.

Seriously people, I need ideas! Anything! Something!

Enjoy the chapter!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything.

* * *

Artemis, Robin, and Batgirl rendezvoused with the rest of the team on the warehouse and told them about Ivy's break out. Red Hood smelled something suspicious. "Wait, she broke out herself? Usually she waits until someone _else _breaks her out."

"Guess she had something important to do." Robin said cheerfully. "Anyway, lets go. Try to steer clear of her if you can."

The group continued on, trying to keep up with the bats who apparently thought it was amusing to disappear, freak everyone else, and then reappear and act like nothing had happened. They stopped some robberies, a few attempted rapings, and a murder. In about half an hour. The team couldn't believe how bad Gotham really was. They had barely covered a third of the area that Robin wanted them to patrol, and already there had been so much. It wasn't like the missions the team went on, where there was usually one super villain coming up with some elaborate plot. These were ordinary people on the streets, doing horrible things.

No wonder Batman was so… Batman.

After all this, some of the team was beginning to wonder if the cheerfulness that Robin always displayed was, in fact, an act. No one could live and work here without becoming scarred and haunted by _something. _And Robin had to see so much more than normal people did.

People said that Gotham could bring anyone down. Moving through the city now, the team believed that. They knew that they probably would not last a single night in Gotham on their own. They just weren't prepared for the magnitude of crime occurring in the streets.

This realization brought a new respect for Robin. They had all respected them before, yes, but had also had an irrational sense that they had to protect him, shield him from the horrors the world had to offer. Now, they were beginning to see that maybe it was _Robin _who was shielding _them_. Batman and Robin stopped Gotham from spilling out and tainting the rest of the world. It was an impossible mission, but they tried nevertheless.

About halfway through patrol, Robin and Batgirl did their typical disappearing thing. They were having a lot of fun with this. This time when they disappeared, they moved to a warehouse roof above where the team was stopping a robbery.

"Well," Batgirl remarked, "patrol's sure easier with them."

"Yeah." Robin murmured. "It feels like cheating. Powers shouldn't be in Gotham. It's _wrong_."

"I know what you mean." Batgirl nodded. "Gotham is the epitome of _human _evilness, I guess. Human weakness and corruption, or whatever. Having powers here is just going to get you killed faster."

"Hmm. Do you think they'll ever come back after this?"

"Doubt it."

Robin's comm went off in his ear. Batman's voice came through. From BG's reaction, she was hearing it too. "How's patrol going?"

"Fine." Robin answered. "How's preparations going?"

"They're finished. We'll begin in about 10 minutes."

"Alright." Batgirl grinned. "The team's going to _freak_."

Selina's laugh came over the comm. "Oh, yes. They are."

Robin was chuckling as they made their way back to the team. "I can't believe that the team is so naive to think that Bats wouldn't turn this into a training opportunity."

"Or that some of the villain are willing to work with us on some things."

"And they didn't realize we'd do anything we could to make this more painful for them- and more fun for us."

They exchanged evil grins. "They're doomed."

* * *

"Ready, Harley?"

"Whenever you are, Red."

"This is perfect, isn't it? We haven't been able to hang out with the kids in so long. At least, without the Bat."

"Yup. I can't wait. Birdie said he'd tell us some stories about his team."

"And Red said she's bring some snacks."

"Aren't you kidnapping her in the middle of patrol? How's she gonna bring snacks?"

"She's a Bat now, Harley. How do Bats do anything?"

"Right. Is Kitty gonna meet us at the place?"

"Yes, she said it would be too much fun to miss."

"Oh, I can't wait!"

* * *

Yeah, it's just kind of a filler. Oh well. Like I said, writers block.

REVIEW!


	18. Chapter 18

I'm so, so sorry for the wait. I've been inundated with tests/essays/projects. It's nuts.

ANYWAY, plan finally starts in the chappy. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own YJ, or Poison Ivy, or people getting beat up by bonsai trees :)

* * *

Everything was going well. No one had gotten hurt so far, which, to be honest, was making the team a little cocky. They could handle Gotham. It wasn't so bad. I mean, sure, there were a lot of little crimes, but overall, not that bad.

Robin and Batgirl were not amused. Nope, not even a little. And they _definitely _weren't looking forward to teaching the team what Gotham was _really _like.

"Honestly, they should be glad we got all the villains on this." Batgirl muttered to Robin, far enough away so Superboy couldn't hear. "Otherwise, they would have been dead by now." Robin shrugged. "Yeah, but if we hadn't gotten everyone in on it, Bats would never have let them into Gotham." "Speaking of that," Batgirl started, "How did he know we were planning this, and how did he get in on it so fast?" "Oh, we- Selina and I- planned it so he'd be able to do this. We knew he'd find out, and an opportunity to watch the team's pain was something of a _sorry we went behind your back to do this _bribe. He didn't ground me yet, so I'm hoping it worked."

Batgirl paused. "Wow, us Bats really are manipulating and sadistic, aren't we?"

Robin let out a cackle. "That, my dear Batgirl, is what being a troll is all about. Oh, there's the warehouse. Ready?"

"Always."

Lifting his hand towards his comm, Robin gave the signal to begin the plan. A moment later, they heard a noise coming from the warehouse.

"Should we check it out?" Miss Martian asked uncertainly. Robin nodded. "We'd better. Ok teams, split up." He caught Kid Flash's eyes before they left and gave a tiny nod. It was time for the plan.

When the team made their way into the warehouse, Kid Flash almost instantly triggered a tripwire while zooming around using his super speed. Bright lights snapped on, illuminating the warehouse.

"Well well." A voice said above them. "What do we have here?" Everyone looked up… and found themselves faced with a wall of vines, a red-haired woman sitting in the middle of them.

Artemis gulped.

"I was expecting some Bats and a Bird." Poison Ivy continued. "I suppose two out of three isn't bad… but what are the rest of you, the sidekick squad?"

"_Partners!" _Aforementioned sidekicks shouted, exasperated. "Really, is it so hard to remember?" KF muttered.

"Whatever you are," Ivy rolled her eyes, "I suppose you'll do."

And with that, the plants attacked. Vines shot out from everywhere, and an army of miniature bonsais marched out towards them.

"Terrific." Superboy muttered, before getting drawn into the fight.

Before long, the plants overwhelmed the trainee-Bats, Miss Martian, and Superboy. Kaldur and Artemis kept fighting, but eventually they were defeated too. As soon as everyone else was down, the plants retreated and Ivy descended to the warehouse floor. "Well, that went well." She grinned.

Batgirl, Robin, and Kid Flash grinned at her. "Asterous." Robin exclaimed. "We've got cameras set up, right? I want to see their faces when they realize we're gone."

"You really are disturbed." Batgirl commented. Robin smirked. "Alright, if you don't want to see…"

"Are you kidding? Of course I do!"

"Now who's disturbed?" Robin taunted. Ivy laughed. "As amusing as this is, we should probably get going. They're probably going to wake up soon, and we should get to the greenhouse before they do."

They nodded and set out.

"Bet you five bucks it takes them an hour to figure out that Poison Ivy= greenhouse." Kid Flash grinned.

"20 that it takes two." Robin responded.

"I'm going to go with all night." Batgirl rolled her eyes. "They're practically incompetent. Hood and RR are their only hope. Actually, bet you 30 we're going to have to rescue them before they rescue us."

"I don't think anyone would take that bet." Ivy commented. "That being said, Red, you owe me 10. It only took me ten minutes to get them all down."

"How long did you say, BG?" Robin asked with interest.

"I said 20 minutes. I had a little faith in your team. It's gone now."

Robin cackled so loudly, it was a wonder that it didn't wake the team up.

* * *

Yeah, the betting thing just kind of... happened. I don't know where it came from. And I am aware I kinda cheated with the fight.

I need ideas people!

REVIEW!


	19. Chapter 19

Hey! Sorry for the wait. I meant to post this a few days ago, but a certain hurricane got in the way. It's kind of hard to post if there's no internet...

Anyway, enjoy!

Oh, and if anyone reading also reads my other stories, the next chapter of Divided should be up later today.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything.

* * *

Aqualad groaned and slowly raised his head, wincing against the headache. He looked around, his first instinct to make sure his team was alright. No one was awake but him. Slowly, he stood and made his way to the person closest to him- Artemis. He gently shook her awake. "What happened?" She moaned. "I'm afraid Ivy defeated us." Aqualad informed her. "We must wake everyone else, then we can figure out what to do now." Artemis nodded, moving towards Miss Martian. "It was almost like she didn't recognize me." Artemis muttered. "She comes over to our place all the time. She wouldn't attack me like that."

Kaldur paused. Something about this seemed fishy. "I… I am not sure why she did not recognize you. Perhaps she never saw you in costume?"

"No, she has. We've met sometimes when I go to the zeta beam. She recognized me right away the first time. And is it just me, or should the Bat kids have some sort of weed killer in their arsenal?"

Kaldur nodded. "Robin does. He showed me once."

"So why didn't he use it?"

Now Kaldur knew something was up, but he pushed it out of his mind to keep waking up the rest of the team. After 15 minutes, several punches from startled teammates, and some swearing from Red Hood, everyone was awake.

"What do we do now?" Superboy demanded. "We can't just leave that woman running around Gotham."

"We will find her." Kaldur assured him. "Perhaps Robin or Batgirl could assist us."

Just then, he became aware of someone tugging on his pant leg. He looked down to see Red Robin gazing up to him.

"Um, Mr. Aqualad?" He said tentatively. "Robin an' Batgirl an' Kid Flash aren't here."

Everyone looked around in alarm. Sure enough, there was no sign of the older Bats and the adopted-Bat.

"Terrific." Artemis muttered. "Ivy must have taken them."

"Yes." Kaldur nodded. "But to where?"

_In an unspecified location (aka some greenhouse):_

"Jeez." Batgirl grumbled. "You would think that they would notice the lack of creepy cackle and bad puns sooner." Robin punched her playfully on the arm. "Yeah, they're not the best with observational skills."

He, Batgirl, Kid Flash, Harley, Ivy, and Selina were sitting on some vine couches that Ivy had grown, snacking on popcorn and watching the team on secret Bat-cams that the Bat-kids had planted. Sure enough, Batgirl had, somehow, managed to hide snacks somewhere on her person, and upon arriving to the greenhouse had produced them. She had denied that Zatanna or Zatara put an extension spell or something on her belt. Robin had backed her up, pointing out the fact that Batman hated magic and would never let it close to their equipment.

Speaking of Batman, he was no doubt watching the fun from the safety of his Batcave.

"Well, at least Aqualad suspects something." Selina commented. "Maybe they're not completely hopeless."

"And Artie noticed that you guys weren't really fighting to the best of you abilities." Ivy added.

"True." Robin shrugged. "But still they missed the clues we planted."

"What clues?" Harley asked suspiciously. "What're you kids up to now?"

"Well, if they were paying attention, they would have noticed that we planted some old fertilizer that used to be manufactured from this greenhouse." Batgirl rolled her eyes. "But they completely missed it. Look, they're leaving."

Sure enough, the team had just left to begin their search- minus an essential clue.

"Idiots." Kid Flash smirked

* * *

Yeah, the team has to work on observational skills. The Bats are making this as close to a Gotham case as they can, and the Team isn't used to that. They're more used to Batman going _this is what's going on you have to do this go here. _

__Review!


	20. Chapter 20

Sorry for the wait, but I'm losing steam with this. Much more interested in Divided at the moment.

Yes, it's short. Oh well.

Anyway, enjoy the chapter. This story is starting to come to a close, so enjoy it while you can.

DISCLAIMER: Yeah, no. Uh uh. Not gonna happen.

* * *

The team decided to split up in an attempt to cover more ground to find their missing teammates. Red Hood had muttered something about how maybe that wasn't the best idea, since none of them knew how the heck to survive Gotham despite the extensive study session. Regardless of his protests, they had split up. Unfortunately, it hadn't made much of a difference.

It was nearing dawn, and the team was still no closer to finding Robin, Batgirl, and Kid Flash. They knew that if they didn't find them son, Batman would likely murder them. Violently. With help from Catwoman. And Flash.

Aqualad's voice sounded over the link.

_Everyone, meet back at Wayne Towers. We need to regroup and come up with a new strategy. _

_Will it make any difference? _Superboy grumbled. _Batman's going to murder us anyway. _

Aqualad bit back a sigh. _Yes, it will make a difference. If we can find him before we are to meet at the cave, perhaps we can hide this from Batman. _

_Good luck with that. _Artemis muttered. _Batman knows everything that happens in Gotham. He'll know about this. _

_Then why isn't he here helping us? _

_Add another bullet onto the list of things that don't add up about this. _Artemis retorted. _Look, something is going on here, and we're not in on it. _

_Artemis is right. _Megan said quietly. _Robin, Batgirl, and Kid Flash were expecting something like this. They were blocking their thoughts from me, but Wally isn't so good. He was anticipating that something would happen… something more than just routine crime. _

Everyone turned towards her.

_And you didn't tell us this earlier why?_

_I didn't think it mattered. _Megan shrugged.

By this point, everyone was on the roof.

"Alright." Aqualad said. "What we normally would do is not working. We need a new plan- something that will work in this environment. Red Hood, Red Robin, perhaps you can help us with this. How do Batman and Robin track down criminals?"

Hood thought for a moment. "Well, first off, they investigate the crime scene. Look for clues there."

"Perhaps we should return to the warehouse then." Aqualad suggested. Hood shook his head. "Abandoned warehouses don't stay abandoned for long in Gotham. Someone will probably have been there already tonight; plus, any evidence would be old. That's probably going to be a no-go. That's why Batman always goes there first."

"Alright. What do they do next?"

"Bring up their file on the Batcomputer." Red Robin answered promptly. "Look at old hideouts and stuff."

"Well, going back to the cave is out." Hood mused. "Red, you got your hologlove?"

In answer, Red Robin brought up Poison Ivy's file on his glove. "No fair." Artemis muttered. "Bats have all the cool toys."

RR grinned at her. "OK, typical hideouts. Um.. parks-"

"Nope. We would have noticed by now."

"-Wherever Babs is-"

"That doesn't really help us."

"-oh, greenhouse, duh. 9 times out of 10."

"Greenhouse it is." Hood grinned. "And I know which one's closest to that warehouse. C'mon!"

* * *

"Well, it's about time." Batman growled. "They have no observational skills. And did they really not realize that I would have Wayne Towers completely covered?"

"Well, they're certainly not up to Bat standards." Alfred commented. "They're young and mostly untrained, Master Bruce. Perhaps you should remedy that."

"Oh, I will." Batman muttered. "If this had been a real captive situation, Robin could be dead by now. This is _not _acceptable."

He glanced over to another window- one showing Robin, Batgirl, Kid Flash, and the various villains that had 'kidnapped' them. Well, at least they were having a good time.

* * *

I have nothing to say down here.

REVIEW!


	21. Chapter 21

I am so, so, so, so, so, so sorry for the wait. I looked up and was like, crap, I didn't post a chapter this week, and I totally should have put this up _days _ago, and aaaarggghhh. Yeah.

Um... so, unless you guys feel like there's some loose end to tie up, or just really want something else to happen, this will be the last chapter of this story. T.T

So, enjoy the last chappy.

DISCLAIMER: *snore*

* * *

Robin looked up when the wall next to him crumbled. His team came barreling in, very not-subtle or covert in any way, despite the fact that they were supposedly a covert team. Red Robin and Red Hood started berating them. None of them noticed Robin watching amusedly.

"Guys, we do not just bust a hole in the wall." Red Hood scolded. "I don't know how your apparently incompetent team does things, but in Gotham, that does not work. You're just lucky that we weren't assaulted by mooks yet."

"And we make a plan first." Red Robin added. "Not just bust in and hope for the best. You guys should probably stay far, far away from Gotham in the future if you are attached to your life and other body parts."

"Can we just find the idiots who got kidnapped?" Artemis grumbled. _She _knew better.

"Yes, perhaps we should split up to cover more ground. Superboy, you and Miss Martian-"

Robin coughed.

The team froze and turned to look at him. Robin casually finished drying his hands on a towel. "As nice as it is to know that you did actually find us before dawn," he drawled, "was it quiet necessary to punch a hole through the wall of the _bathroom_? You're just lucky I was done, or I would have been really annoyed."

Megan blushed. The others looked fairly disturbed. Disturbed turned to relief. Relief turned to confusion- he didn't seem worried, or tied up or thrown in a dungeon or tortured or even hurt. He still had his utility belt and everything.

"Is… is something going on here that we don't know about?" Superboy asked uncertainly- or at least, as uncertainly as Superboy got. Robin rolled his eyes. "Come on. And you thought we were the idiots."

He turned and led the Team back towards the main room, smirking. Everyone was completely confused. Was nothing in Gotham the way it was supposed to be?

"Hey, look who finally showed up." Robin called as he entered the room. Everyone else looked up.

"Oh, it's the kiddies." Harley squealed. Ivy rolled her eyes. "They're hardly worth the excitement, Harles, they're not very good."

"Thank god, we ran out of popcorn an hour ago." Batgirl grumbled. "And you can only watch idiots traipsing around your home for so long without getting depressed."

Wally zipped over and pecked Artemis on the cheek. "Hey, Babe." He grinned. "What took so long?" Artemis took a step away from them, gaping, then crossed her arms. "I'm going with mind control."

"Dunno." Red Hood mused. "Might be clones." Superboy growled at him. The boy raised his hands in surrender. "Well, it's a possibility."

Selina sighed. "Is it really so hard to imagine that we all might be on good terms? You didn't seem to have a problem with _me._"

"This is different." Megan said. "I mean, Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy are actual villains, and normally when villains kidnap people, it's more…"

"Torture-y?" Artemis supplied. "I guess that works. Does that count as a word?" Megan frowned. "Well, if aster is apparently a part of the standard dictionary…" Artemis rolled her eyes.

After this, explanations ensued. After the explanations, Selina handed out snacks as most of the people present watched Artemis beating up Kid Flash while the Batkids ganged up on the elder Bats. Although they were annoyed that they had been put through so much, the team appreciated the lesson that they had been taught. When there actually was a hostage situation, hopefully they would perform better.

And stay far, far away from Gotham.

"You do realize that Bats is going to give you a lot of extra training, right?" Batgirl questioned. "Because he was totally watching from the Batcave and is probably disgusted with your performances. Good luck walking for the next month or so."

The team blanched as Robin's signature cackle bounced off the walls.

* * *

So, mission accomplished. Team will never, ever step foot in Gotham again unless they are forced to.

I hope you enjoyed this story! Now, I am going to go work on Divided.

REVIEW!


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